Breakups are difficult for everyone. Putting in so much time and emotion into a relationship only to see it fall apart takes a toll on most people. While breakups are bad, not having the strength to move on is worse. You need to understand that life is so much more than the person you were with and you shouldn’t let your breakup come in the way of you achieving your dreams. However, this realisation is difficult to come by, especially when all you want to do is drown your sorrows in a huge tub of ice cream.
Now that the tub is over, listen up as we give you some life advice that will rebuild your self-esteem and answer the question – how to get over a breakup!
Make yourself your number one priority
The easiest answer to ‘how to get over a breakup’ is putting yourself first! A breakup can be emotionally and sometimes even physically draining. So it is imperative that you take some time off to recuperate. Do the things that make you happy. Pick something that you’ve wanted to do for a while. Whether it’s treating yourself to a luxury spa experience or taking that long overdue road trip with your friends, give in to your heart’s desires. By making yourself your number one priority, you’ll start to slowly rebuild your self-worth.
Pen down your thoughts and feelings
There is a wide range of emotions that cloud your mind after a relationship ends. You feel anger, resentment, and loneliness amongst other things. You need to get over these negative emotions and learn to embrace positivity and happiness once again. If you feel you’re not strong enough to move on your own, you can always visit a therapist. But if you think you are, there is no better therapy than self-therapy. Write down your feelings and thoughts along the lines of why you think the relationship did and didn’t work. Perhaps you could even write a hypothetical letter to your ex, containing all that you wanted to say to them. This can help you focus on what you’ve learned from your relationship so you can do better next time.
Forgive yourself for mistakes and also forgive your ex
It doesn’t matter why your relationship ended. Whether it was because your ex wasn’t ready to stand up to his parents for you or because you cheated on our ex, what’s done is done. All that matters is moving on and giving life another chance. But for that, you need to first be able to forgive yourself. You can do this by creating a re-do. Write down how you would’ve done things differently if you could go back and do it again. By doing this, you learn from past mistakes and move one step closer in the direction of forgiving yourself.
Learn to say ‘No’
Learn to say “no” to things that aren’t serving you. Say “no” to unwanted obligations and activities that suck your energy level without giving you a trace of happiness in return. Say “no” to people who make you feel bad about yourself and the decisions you’ve made. Say “no” if your ex tries to pull you back into a dysfunctional relationship. Do the things that you enjoy with the people who love and support you. Learn to realise that you deserve better than what you’ve come to accept.
Meeting new people can really take your mind off an unpleasant situation. So take every opportunity to socialize and talk to other people. Whether it’s a cousin or a long-lost friend, now’s the time to play catch-up. During a relationship, people get so lost in being with their partner that they forget there are other relations and people that matter too. When you feel ready, you can get back into the dating pool. Just remember, when you finally do, make sure you don’t project the negative qualities of your ex on to your next relationship.
Breakups are difficult. With time, however, old wounds can be healed. Fasten the healing process by following the above-mentioned tips. Focus on the things that make you happy and the rest will fall into place!
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