We’re all victims of occasional bouts of self-doubt. Even the most successful and confident among us have their moments of insecurity. Self-confidence can be a very delicate and complex thing. A few are born with it; others learn it early on and the rest of us have to learn to build it on our own. Lucky for us, confidence can be built and strengthened until it becomes natural, just as any other habit. It simply takes a little time, some effort, and a bit of attention. Here are 14 ways to be more self-confident every day.
1. Are you human? So am I:
Whenever you’re about to interact with someone and you feel your confidence dwindling, remember that that person is human just like you.
No matter who they are, how successful or beautiful they are, they must have their own doubts and insecurities and they’re probably much more concerned about what you’ll think of them than what they think of you! Ultimately, all of us are looking for the same thing: a meaningful connection with one another. Then why get scared?
Still unsure? Here’s how to be a brilliant conversationalist.
2. Your body speaks before your do:
If you want an instant dose of confidence, optimising your posture is one of the fastest ways. Try it right now: Stand up straight. Puff your chest out a bit. Lift your chin up. Put a confident smile on your face. Boom, there you go. Feeling better already?
Whenever you’re about to do something that requires confidence, get your “confident posture” on. Not only will you feel more empowered, others will also perceive you and treat you differently.
3. Dress like you feel:
If you’ve never taken steps to assess and improve your wardrobe, you may not realise the dramatic effect it can have on your confidence level. How we dress affects both how we feel about ourselves and the way others perceive us.
Everything from the style of your shirts to the colour of your glasses frames affects how people view you. When how you appear is in sync with how you want people to view you, confidence can easily follow.
4. Work Out:
Working out is one of the fastest ways to boost your confidence. Not only does it help you develop a body you’re proud of, it also gives you the profound satisfaction of doing what you know is right for you. Better physical condition and appearance gives you more body confidence, and as a bonus, the extra endorphins give you an added energy boost.
5. Be prepared:
The more prepared you are for any situation or task, the more confident you’ll feel about your expertise and competency. Preparation will help you avoid getting tripped up by life’s unexpected glitches.
Learn everything you can about your industry, your subject matter, your goals and what drives you towards success. Before you start a task, first imagine how you want to feel once you’ve completed it. Don’t try to accomplish too much at once. Break complex tasks up into small, bite-size, manageable pieces.
6. Celebrate Your Wins:
Every time something good happens to you, take time to celebrate it. Give yourself a pat on the back. Call your mom. Do a happy dance. Go out with friends. Whatever you do, celebrate! You’ve earned it!
Keep a list of successes, big and small. It’ll help you to see your abilities in a more positive (and realistic) light.
7. Take Action!:
If you want to get more confident, you gotta take massive action. Make a plan and get after it. Take risks. Lean in to fear. Make things happen. Bite sized goals are easier and quicker to achieve and the momentum can give you a boost when attacking bigger goals.
Every time you put yourself out there and take action, you earn a little extra confidence and prepare yourself for an even better future.
8. Surround Yourself with Inspiring People:
To build your confidence, it is critical that you spend most (or all) of your time around people who believe in you, encourage you and support you. If you have negative people in your life, let them go.
Spend time with those who uplift you. It’s way more fun and will do wonders for your confidence.
9. Adopt the Growth Mindset:
You can either go through life with a fixed mindset (this is the way I am and I’m going to stay this way) or with a growth mindset (I’m a work in progress and getting better every day). By adopting the growth mindset, you recognise that every situation is an opportunity to learn and grow.
It takes away a lot of pressure and allows you to be fully confident because you know that regardless of the outcome, you’ll have become a slightly better version of yourself.
10. Clean Your Room:
If you want a clear mind, clear out your bedroom. A clean room is a happy mind. It should feel calming to know that everything is in its proper place. Also, after you are done cleaning your room you will get the feeling of accomplishment which would, in turn, boost your overall confidence.
11. Be Vulnerable:
Being vulnerable to be more confident? Doesn’t sound right, doesn’t it?
Here’s the deal: if you’re willing to open up and share your insecurities, you’ll allow yourself to receive help from others and you’ll have much less of a burden to carry with you. You’ll be free to be you. Being vulnerable here means being authentic. Being authentic means being real and being real is the root of being truly confident.
12. Accept Compliments Gracefully:
Just like celebrating your wins is important, make sure to embrace compliments. We all have a tendency to shrug off compliments people give us, but why?
When someone gives you a compliment, say thank you, and allow yourself to appreciate it.
13. Don’t compare:
No two people are ever the same. So, stop measuring yourself against others. What you see isn’t always real or the complete picture. Making comparisons is damaging and an inaccurate measure of success anyway.
14. Be your own friend:
When you hear that voice in your head, abusing, attacking and belittling you, remind yourself that a friend wouldn’t talk to you in that manner. Practice self love and believe in yourself like a friend would.
15. Fix things you don’t like about yourself:
As much as it might hurt to say, sometimes the problem isn’t your attitude or your emotions. Sometimes you need to change some things. This doesn’t have to mean you’re a bad person or not good at things, but it does mean that if you want to be more confident in a particular area, the best way to do so is to get better.
Feel crappy because you can’t play the guitar? Practice. Do conversations about politics or economics make you feel unintelligent? Read up about it. Ask for help, even. There’s nothing wrong with admitting you don’t know something, but pretending you do when you don’t won’t help your confidence.
16. Think and act positively:
Positive energy leads to positive outcomes. So set your mind to the can-do side of any situation, avoiding the negative self-talk that can make you feel less confident. Smile, laugh and surround yourself with happy, positive people. You’ll feel better and develop more peace and confidence.
Ultimately, confidence is earned, not hacked. You have to use these tips day in and day out. Make them a part of your lifestyle. It’ll take some effort on your part, but there is probably nothing more worthwhile. Because living with confidence not only feels amazing, it opens the doors to anything you want to accomplish in life and that is what it’s all about.